The Truth
by dont-let-him-take-you-from-me
Summary: Based on the spoilers for Stefan possibly turning off his humanity. What if he does and realizes he's been pinning after the wrong girl? Stelena. Bamon
1. Chapter 1

"Did it work?" Elena asked Stefan, eying him suspiciously.

"Oh, it worked." A slight smirk, formed on Stefan's lips.

"Ok, good, but where is Caroline?" Elena's eyes searched the room, looking around.

"I don't care." Stefan said.

"What?" Elena replied, confused.

"Elena.. you know what I love about life? The fact that we are vampires we can do whatever the hell we want.. don't you want to have fun? Even just a little bit?

"Stefan.. what are you saying?"

Stefan leaned in close to Elena's ear. "I want to have fun with you, Elena."

She shivered and Stefan chuckled.

"Stefan.. we can't." She didn't want to admit it but she felt a pull with Stefan, whenever he was around.

"And why the hell not?" He whispered, his lips, sweeping over her earlobe.

"It's wrong.." She bit her lip.

"But wrong never felt so right."

She closed her eyes, as his lips pressed to hers, she allowed herself to relax. She missed it, missed this feeling, missed the way his lips molded with hers perfectly. Her hands found his hair and she felt herself kissing back. But wait, why was she doing this? You love Damon. She told herself as she allowed Stefan to pull her closer. He pulled back slightly, searching her face.

"Do you not feel that connection we used to have?.. the way my hands would touch your waist, the butterflies you have right now from being pressed against me?"

Stefan's lips kissed down her neck.

Elena felt herself crumbling in his presence.

She tugged his hair, letting him kiss down her neck.

You don't love Damon, maybe you never really did.


	2. Chapter 2

Please review and let me know what you want to see next time around! WARNING: CONTAINS SMUT.

Part two

His hands are down my back, lifting up my shirt and all I can do is comply.

His warm hands feel great down my back as his lips crash into mine.

I need to stop this, it isn't right, this doesn't feel good.. it feels great.

My hands, lift up his shirt, running my fingers down his gorgeous body

"See doesn't it feel good?" His voice taunts in my ear.

I can barely hold on.

His lips trail down my neck again, a cold surface invades my back and I realize I am being pushed up against the wall. I hiss.

I feel his fingers move slowly, pulling down my skirt.

I close my eyes, and spread my legs for him.

I feel his fingers plunge in me, it's not until I feel myself tremble, I realize I'm shaking.

This feels too good, too right.

I move my body against his deft fingers.

A sudden burst of electricity has courses thorough me and I feel myself sliding down the wall.

All I hear is in the room is heavy breathing. I know it his him and I.

His forehead is pressed against mine.

I stare into his eyes.

Regret, I feel a insane amount of regret but something else too.

Pleasure.

He smirks down at me, making Damon's usual expression seem like child's play.

I need him.

"Stefan.. this can't happen again. You belong with Caroline." I say, making a distance between us.

"You and I both know that's bull shit, Elena. I may have my humanity off but I'm not stupid."

"What do you mean?"

"I know you're still in love with me, otherwise you wouldn't let me do what I just did."

A protest is about to reflect my lips when he just shurgs and walks away.

I know he is right but I don't want to admit that all this time I've spent with his brother has been a mistake. Because it has.

"Hey, where are you going?"

"I'm sticking to the original plan. I'm going to find Caroline." He replys.

Jealousy shoots through me in fast waves.

"Fine, do that." I spit out, walking in the opposite direction.

I'm not sure but I swear I hear his dark chuckle in the moonlight.


	3. Chapter 3

**Please review and rate for me. I just keep coming up with the ideas somehow. Let me know if I should continue. Please and thank you! WARNING: contains masturbation. **

Part three

I walk home in the cold, I can still feel his hands touching my everywhere. I bit my lip and shake my head to rid myself from these thoughts.

I didn't need him.

I head inside the boarding house to see it completely empty.

Where was Damon? I check my phone and see he left me a voice mail, I decide to check it later.

I shed my coat off and throw it on the chair, the cold air exposes me and I think about where Stefan's lips were not even twenty minutes ago.

I tell myself to stop thinking about it but every time I close my eyes I see images of his face when he was touching me, his deep brooding stare, how he was looking at me while his fingers were inside me. How I swore I saw his vampire face come out. He turned his humanity off and now was probably shaking up with Caroline. My insides went cold.

He doesn't want her though, no matter how much he lets on. I remind myself. He wants you.

He said it with no humanity. It's the truth. I close my eyes and relive the moments by myself. I gasp when I come to an end. My fingers coated with my sin. I'm furious at myself for letting him have this effect on me. I realize I can't shake him. I need to let him know. Before he makes a huge mistake in all of this. I grab my coat and throw it on, I know exactly where he is. I walk out the door hoping that this isn't all a mistake.

I enter the bar and see him, hunched over the counter, a bottle of whiskey in his hand, writing in a journal. His victims. I come up behind him and touch his shoulder. He flinches before he realizes who it is.

"Ready to admit it?"

His question throws me off. I cross my arms.

"Ready to turn your humanity back on?"

"Hardly."

I scowl. I don't like seeing Stefan like this.

"So, did you find her?" I ask, trying to make conversation

He stares at me for a moment.

"No." He said, closing the journal.

I lick my lips. "Oh."

He moves closer to me.

"Is Elena Gilbert jealous?" He smiles, out of pride.

"No." I say, rolling my eyes.

He smirks. "I smell something on you. You and I both know what it is."  
I turn around to avoid his gaze, his hand touches my waist and I feel myself surrendering again.

"Did someone get hot and bothered thinking about all the delicious things I could be doing to you?" His whisper, makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. I control my breathing.

"No."

I gasp when he slaps my butt lightly.

"One for lying, Elena."

His voice in my ear again.

"You know I remember our sex it was great sex...the way you would writhe under me when my tongue would pleasure you, how you would scream out my name when I hit your spot, the things I would call you when we would make love.. do you remember that?"

I am sure if I had a heart right now it would be beating out of my chest.

I close my eyes as his tongue slides across my neck.

"Do you?" He taunts me again.

I hear a whimper escape my lips.

"Good girl." He steps back and I am cold without him

I control my breathing in his presence.

"I just wanted you to admit it." He says in a dull tone.

I subconsciously run my fingers through my hair. The words tumble out before I can stop them.

"I want you."

He stares at me, his eyes roaming my body and back up.

"Then let's make it happen." He says, extending his hand out to me.

I follow the devil's lead, sure that this night was going to be the end of me.


	4. Chapter 4

His hand is in mine and I know he feels no emotions towards this but I'm on fire.

His hand slides down to my elbow, turning me to face him.

I stare into his eyes, my stomach doing flip flops.

He looks deeply into my eyes as if he's trying to memorize my soul.

His hands go to my waist to pull me even closer, it's only then I realize I am not prepared.

I've never had sex with a emotionless Stefan before.

My gaze drifts down to the ground and as his lips connect to mine.

His tongue swirls with mine, making my head spin.

It feels so good. I lift up my arms, wrapping them onto his neck.

He deepens the kiss and pushes me onto the bed of the swanky motel he rented for the night.

He's on top of me and I love it. I feel every inch of him pressing into my thigh.

I moan as he moves his lips to my neck, I invite his lips by tilting my neck so he can kiss every square inch of it.

I moan again when his teeth latch onto my neck, biting it.

My fingers run through his hair, closing my eyes.

He moves back up, kissing my lips as he unbuttons my blouse, he places sloppy kisses down my collarbone, tweaking a nipple on top of my bra. My blouse falls to the floor, I try to reach up and kiss him but his hand forms around my throat, pushing me down on the bed.

I gasp. I hear his chuckle in the dark.

I shiver.

He removes one strap of my bra, kissing my shoulder.

I close my eyes again, not believing this is really happening.

He slides down the other strap, leaving a love bite on my shoulder.

My bra falls to the floor, his large hands encase my hardened nipples.

I moan as he pinches them hard, his tongue replacing his fingers, I pull him closer by his head, whimpering his name.

"S-stefan."

"That's my name." He whispers in the dark, showing the other nipple the same attention. His other hand goes over my core, touching it between my panties. I bit my lip.

"You're so wet, Elena, is this all for me?" He whispers the question in my ear.

I don't give him an answer, his mouth finds my breast again, suckling it.

I throw my head back as sensations I shouldn't be feeling right now come back to me in waves.

His fingers hook to my panties and I feel him pulling them down.

My eyes remain closed.

He gets them off and runs his hand over my slick heat.

I gulp in the darkness.

Before I can say anything his fingers are inside me, pushing away at everything I stand for.

I moan loud and grind against his fingers.

I see him smirk and he slows down his pace. I spread my legs a tiny bit wider.

"Come on Stefan, no one likes a tease."

"Tell me how much you missed me, how you thought about me in your darkest thoughts and fantasized about me in your wildest dreams.. hm Elena?Did you use to touch yourself? Did it feel this good with D-

I shut him up with a bruising kiss on the mouth.

He growls and kisses me back, pumping into me harder.

I move with his fingers again, he groans, pushing in and out.

It doesn't take me long to reach my end, I pant as he pulls his fingers out.

"Time for you to get undressed." I mumble, and tug off his shirt.

He lets me. I run my fingers down his chest, worshiping it.

I kiss down his chest, now it's his turn to throw his head back I think with a smirk on my lips.

I undo his belt, tugging his pants down so he is left in his boxers. He shoots a glance at me and it's so deep that it makes my breath come out in gasps.

It's only then I realize his tip is inside of me in one swift movement.

I jerk my hips up to his and watch him groan.

He moves his hips with mine until he is the dominant one.

My nails find the back of his neck, digging them in his flesh while moaning.

"Stop teasing! I yell and flash him my fangs.

He smirks and eases himself into me.

I grab the back of his neck, tugging on his hair.

He starts out his rhythm again, digging his fingers into my hip bones.

I moan loud and ride it out with him.

"Stefan..!" I gasp, as he buries his face into my neck, biting it with human teeth.

I shudder as he nips at my neck, I move at the same pace he is moving. Fire shot through my veins as he went deeper in me.

"Fuck this is so hot.. bite me." He pants in my ear, moving me with him.

I agree delighted as my fangs sink into his shoulder.

He groans as I suck his blood, different feelings surge through me as I close my eyes.

It was like that one guy that let me drink from him but so much better.

I feel a tightness in my stomach and it's not until I cry out I realize I'd come. Stefan thrusts into my a few more times, meeting his end also.

He drops to the bed, panting and I just being on his lap, fall onto his chest, exhausted.

I hear his heart beat going a mile minute against me as I sink into a peaceful slumber.

I don't realize I'm asleep until I feel his fingers stroke my hair, waking me up.

I turn towards him, expecting him to have a stone face but he surprises me for a moment, I must be delirious from the sex we just had but I catch a hint of sadness in his eyes.

Sad that's an emotion, I think.

"Are we done here?" He asks, bluntly.

I feel my soul crushing.

"Yeah." I try to play it off like this didn't matter but it did.

"You know if you're hurting that much." He replies. He must have noticed the hurt in my voice. Sometimes I hate how receptive he was towards me.

"You can just turn it off." He taunts, smirking at me.

I stare at him for a second.

"Or I can just bring you back." I say, determined.

He grunts at me

"Yeah, like that's going to work, I don't love you anymore, Elena."

I scoff. "Sure, Stefan.

You can pretend not to care, turn off your emotions to not feel, but I know deep down there's a part of you that loves me, even after the horrible thing I did to you. Because, you know what?" I shake my head lightly, not sure if I should finish this sentence or not.

He stares at me, unaffected.

"I will always love you." I finish.

His face goes blank for a moment and I'm sure I catch a hint of something in his eyes but before I can react on it, he glares at me.

"Well, that's just too bad." He says, standing up from the bed.

I squint my eyes at him for a second.

"I will bring you back from the edge, Stefan."

He scoffs.

"Get out." He says.

I oblige and put my clothes on in vampire speed, before he can have a change of mind, I am out the door and walking back to the Salvatore estate in seconds.

**_Ehh I don't know how I feel about this chapter, do you guys feel like Elena should turn it off? just for the record: Stefan didn't say he loved Elena, again. Besides he's void of love right now, tell me if you liked the Stelena angst or not because I love making it! Give me some feed back. :) thanks for all the great reviews. _**


	5. Chapter 5

_Part five:_

I lay in bed that night contemplating on what I'm going to do about this emotionless Stefan. Obviously he felt something when we had sex. I also saw a flash of emotion in his eyes when I told him I was going to bring him back. Because I was. He couldn't hide from me for that long. My thoughts were interrupted when I heard the door of the boarding house shut, I threw off my covers, using my vampire hearing to get a closer angle on what was about to happen. My feet barely touched the floor when I heard loud music start to play

"_load up your guns, bring your friends, it's fun to lose and pretend."_

I opened my bedroom door and walked to the foyer, next to the stairs.

"_hello, hello, hello, how low?"_

I reached the bottom of the stairs, to see Stefan and some girl, leaned against the wall. His hands, on her waist, his fangs sunk into her neck. She moaned and he fed from her, running her fingers across his hair. I stood behind them and cleared my throat.

Stefan pulled his fangs from the girl and looked my way.

"Hello Elena." His vampire face still intact.

"Stefan, what are you doing?" I asked, confused.

"Having some fun, want some?"

He thrust the girl's wrist out to me.

I shook my head.

"Come on don't be such a Debby downer, Caroline would do it."

"Caroline has her humanity off."

"Jealous?" He sank his teeth into her wrist.

I turned away.

Before I knew what was happening he was in front of me. He grabbed my waist, pulling me closer. I started to fight him but gave up knowing that his diet of human blood made him stronger.

He grabbed the girl's wrist again, smearing some blood on his fingers tips.

He backed me up against the wall.

"I like your robe." He whispered in my ear.

Shivers sent down my body.

"What's underneath?"

I closed my eyes and felt his fingers touch my lips.

I growled, feeling my fangs come out.

"That's a good girl." He whispered.

I growled at him, licking the blood off my lips.

I want more. I thought. I need more. I didn't feed today.

Before I knew what was happening, a lunged at the girl, tearing her throat in half.

She moaned as I drank from her.

I felt her heartbeat still below me.

I pulled away, horrified.

Stefan was beside me in a instant.

"You killed are dinner, Elena. Now what are we going to drink?"

I gulped.

His fingers encircled the tie on my robe, pulling it apart.

I felt my insides start to shake.

The robe came undone, falling in sides around my waist.

He gently took a side, his eyes raking over my lingerie.

Lingerie I was supposed to be wearing for Damon.

"You knew I would come back here." I didn't have to see the evil smile on his face to know he had one.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I muttered, trying to turn away.

He grabbed my waist, pulling me as close to him as possible.

I held my breath, staring into his green eyes.

"Stop lying, I know you want me."

"And I know you want to turn your humanity back on." I sneered in his face.

He smirked.

Suddenly, I was pushed against the wall at vampire speed, his hands around my throat.

"What did I tell you Elena, you're not going to bring me back."

His fingers trailed down my lacy bra, to my stomach.

I stared at him, determined. He would not break me, tonight.

I grabbed his hand.

"Don't touch me." I growled.

He just kept putting his fingers lower and lower and lower

Oh.

His fingers dipped into the waistline of my panties.

I closed my eyes, a rush of desire going through me.

He started to rub circles.

I leaned my head back, against the wall.

All I could think about was his damn fingers.

He made my back arch, as he slipped them inside of me.

"Hmmm." I hummed in appreciation

"You like it when I touch you." He whispered in my ear.

He brought another finger in and I gasped.

His hand pushing me more against the wall

I felt the familiar tightening of my stomach

"S-stefan." I moaned, releasing and sliding against the wall.

He pulled his fingers out and licked them.

I growled, I hated it when he teased.

Suddenly, an idea popped into my head as I grabbed his head, pulling it towards mine.

"You love me, Stefan." I whispered, trailing my lips down his neck at a slow pace.

He groaned and leaned against the wall.

I lightly slid my head over his growing bulge.

He hissed, closing his eyes.

"Say you love me." I whispered, rubbing the fabric lightly.

"I..I.." He started, to say, his face twisted in a pain I recognized all too well.

The pain of humanity, the first part. I was getting through to him.

In a flash, he grabbed my hand, holding onto it tightly.

I tried to pull away, unsuccessful.

"Stop." He barked, twisting my hand in an uncomfortable position.

I yelped in pain.

"Stefan, you're hurting me." I gasped.

He threw my hand back down.

"You're going to regret doing that." He snapped, pushing me against the wall.

His bulge on my core.

I grit my teeth. Trying not to lose myself in all of this.

"Don't like being teased Elena?" He noticed my reaction.

He jerked his hips forward.

A rush of tingles sent through me.

"Me either." He whispered, rubbing himself all over me.

I writhed under his body, trying not to moan.

His momentum was agonizingly slow.

I felt myself getting wetter at the second.

A sharp pain went through my neck when I realized he bit me.

His fangs puncturing in my skin.

I whimpered, as he sucked the blood right out of me.

"S-stef." I mumbled, when I began to feel dizzy.

He was going to kill me. I panicked.

He ignored me, still sucking the blood out of me.

"Stefan!." I cried, trying to push him off me.

"You're.. you're gonna kill me." I whispered.

I felt my body began to go faint.

He pulled back, just long enough for me to catch his last words.

"I told you, you would regret it... turn it off." He whispered.

"Turn it off and I'll let you live."

I barely raised my head to see his face, looking at me.

I had a choice here, I could turn it off and live or I could die thinking that would be enough for Stefan to turn it back on.

"Ok.." That was the last thing I said before everything went black.

**Guys i'm really conflicted right now. I've always wanted to write dark!stelena soooooo yeah. Tell me what you think about it :) thank you for all the good reviews! you guys seriously make me want to write! I love you all.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Part 6.**

I open my eyes up to find myself laying on the floor.

I vamp myself up, but then quickly realize Stefan drained half my blood.

"Stefan!" I yell into the empty house, balancing my self on the wall.

Suddenly I am being pushed against the wall again, his fingers around my throat.

I roll my eyes.

"Are you serious?" I ask, bending his arm easily

He grins at me and switches our position so that he's bending mine.

I don't even flinch.

"You're boring me." I yawn. "Give me your wrist."

He lets go of me and eyes me for a second.

"Yes I turned off my humanity. Come on chop chop." I say rolling my eyes.

He smirks and holds out his wrist.

I bite into it, feeling the warm blood flow through my body

I close my eyes.

I feel him stumble in my grasp.

I pull away.

"Let's go get something to eat." I say, walking to the door.

He nods and open the door for me.

"I forgot of how much a bitch you are with your humanity off." He says.

I smirk and walk out the door while he follows close behind me.

I'd be so pissed at him even I didn't have my humanity off.

I think he knows this because he keeps a safe distance between us.

I look over my shoulder at him.

He looks good, standing here. Maybe a little too good

He notices my stare and he casts one at me that makes me want to throw him against the brick wall we're walking towards.

God, he's so hot.

I push away these thoughts and walk into the grill.

"Excuse me miss, we're closed." a bartender says.

I vamp speed up to them and grab their head, looking close into their eyes.

"Grab that knife and cut yourself."

The person zones out and walks to the counter, grabbing the sharp object.

Stefan comes up behind me.

"Nice touch. It's very Hannibal Lectur."

I ignore his comment as the person slices their arm.

Hot blood spills over the counter and I see Stefan's face change.

I smirk and race to the door, locking it.

Stefan watches me, his face contoured

"Eat up, Mr. Salvatore."

He tackles the person, ripping out their jugular.

I watch him, hungry for that power.

The person whimpers but he pays it no mind as he drinks to his delight.

He pulls away, long enough for the person to live.

He glances at me, his face covered in blood.

"Are you going to get some?" He asks, holding the person down.

I shrug and stand up, walking towards the victim.

"Are you going to treat me as rough as you're treating them?" I whisper in his ear.

He shivers and grabs my arm, pulling me down to the floor.

"Uh-ah manners Salvatore." My face begins to change and the person groans beneath us.

I grab what's left of the person's neck and sink my fangs into it, drinking.

I moan as I feel Stefan's hands on my waist.

He pulls me on top of him and I let go of the person, not caring as their dead body hits the bar.

He leans in and kisses me, pulling away a little as he tastes the blood on my lips, his face begins to change again, he slams to the ground, kissing me roughly.

I respond immediately my legs wrapped around his waist, tugging at his hair.

He groans and kisses my neck

My hands go lower, until I'm at his belt, I unbuckle it, not breaking the kiss.

He smirks against my lips but keeps kissing me.

I straddle him, unbuttoning the top button of his pants.

He groans and shifts his hips towards mine

I feel his bulge.

I pull down his zipper, slipping my hand into his boxers.

He groans into my mouth.

I lazily move my hand up and down his shaft, teasing him.

He throws his hand back at this new contact.

I speed my pace up, watching his reaction.

His head is thrown back and a groan escapes his perfect lips.

I move my hand faster and faster until I feel him stiffen.

He comes on the floor and I lick my fingers, standing up.

He pants and shoves his shaft back in his pants.

"I'm bored." I say, standing up.

"Well, I hear there's a club a couple miles away from here, wanna crash it?"

"Only if we can have sex on the bar." I say, crossing my arms.

He leans in and whispers in my ear. "Deal." He says, as he slaps my butt.

_**Yeah so I thought Elena could return the favorrrrrrr. Anyways, how are you liking dark!stelena, I promise things will get better. As far as who's bringing them back, I got a certain witch in mind. Let me know if you guys want Caroline interaction? Bamon? Something? Thank you for all the lovely reviews!**_


	7. Chapter 7

**Part 7**

I look out the window as Stefan drives away from mystic falls.

His hand finds my knee, keeping it there

I look over at him curious and ignore the tingles he sending through out my body.

He moves his hand closer, resting it on my inner thigh.

I ignore him and look out the window.

We stay like this the whole drive, neither one of us speaking.

Stefan pulls into the parking lot of the club.

Once the car is stopped I get out, stretching my long legs, giving Stefan a good view of my ass.

He doesn't glance at it, instead he surveys the parking lot.

I shrug and walk towards the club.

All I hear is the bass booming, and loud music.

I start to go in the club when a hand stops me.

"Excuse me, I'm gonna need to see-"

Before he can get his last word out I snap his neck and watch his lifeless body fall to the ground.

Stefan is behind me in a instant.

I walk over his dead body and start to enter the club when Stefan stops me.

"free blood, Elena." He says, disapproving of my choice to walk away.

"There's plenty more inside." I say in a dull tone, and walk into the club.

Once I enter it, I start dancing.

All the men are staring at me, I shoot them the same hungry glances.

One guy dances close to me, wrapping his hands around my waist.

I let him, dancing along with him.

I wrap my hand around his neck and he pulls me in closer.

I grind against his hips, hearing his pathetic moans.

He runs his hands along my body, turning me around.

The stranger kisses me hard on the mouth and respond kissing him with the same passion.

He grinds on me and I pull him closer by his hair.

Suddenly, I hear a _rip _and see his head fall to the ground.

I groan, and see Stefan, glaring at me.

"What?" I ask, rolling my eyes.

"You should know not to play with your food, didn't I teach you better then that?"

"Whatever, I just wanna dance." I yell.

"Then dance." He yells back, mocking me.

I glare at him, and start to turn away and go find someone new.

Sometimes rippah Stefan was a pain in my ass.

He grabs my hand, pulling me closer to him.

I stand here, being a bitch, and I don't care.

He grabs my hips, grinding himself slowly on me.

I close my eyes, I feel his warmth pressed up against my back.

"Dance with me." He whispers, in my ear, sending shivers down my spine.

I humor him and grind on him, loving the way he groans in my ear.

We dance to our own rhythm, his hands exploring my body.

I see some drunk girls in the corner.

"Hey, let's go get dinner."

"I'm way ahead of you." He says, breaking away from me.

I watch from the corner of my eye as he approaches the girl.

She smiles at him, touching his arm.

She's friendly.

She squeezes his bicep.

A little too friendly.

He has her backed against the wall, kissing her.

I feel something ignite in me.

I march over to them and pull her off him.

He looks at me confused.

"Stand still." I compel her.

She obeys.

I move her hair from her neck, biting into it hard.

She screams.

Stefan quickly compels her to shut up.

I grab her head, drinking from her.

I see Stefan watching me from the corner of his eye.

I wasn't jealous because that would imply I care.

I just don't like bitches touches what's mine.

I pull away from her neck, and throw her at Stefan.

The d.j spins an upbeat song and I walk away from them.

Grinding my hips to the beat.

I watch Stefan watching me and smirk.

This was turning out to be fun after all.

_Comments? Questions, concerns? Hope you enjoyed it, because I enjoyed writing it :) let me know what I should be doing next. Love you!_


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8:

I wake up and find Stefan, next to me.

I don't really remember what happened last night but as soon as I get up. I see bodies scattered across the floor. All with their heads ripped off.

Couldn't of been me, I'm not a ripper.

I poke Stefan, bored.

He groaned and woke up.

"What do you want?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Take a look around, all your doing."

He opens his eyes and looks around, he chuckles.

"Half of that was you, cupcake."

I look at him, blanked face.

"What?"

"You helped me kill all those people, do you not remember last night?"

I shook my head.

"Basically we fed from that girl, you got a little more hungry, started tearing people's heads off, watching them scream and run away, then trap them again. It was actually kinda hot."

I smirk.

"Well this party was a bust, where to next?" I stand up and stretch.

"There's something I always wanted to do with my humanity off and I'm not sure why."

I raise an eyebrow at him.

"Elena Gilbert, will you rob a **bank** with me?"

I smile a little bit.

"Yes, I'd be honored."

He snorts.

"First let's go get some new clothes, there's blood all over mine."

I look down at my wardrobe to see the same applies to me.

He grabs my hand and I walk with him.

We're two partners in crime, Bonnie and Clyde.

We get into the car and head into the clothing store.

"Hello, how may I help you?" an overly cheery person asks us.

Stefan and I glare at her.

She walks away, confused.

I roll my eyes.

Humans are so weak.

Stefan walks to the mens section, **looking for** a new shirt.

I find a dress I like and start changing in the middle of the store.

Stefan eyes my a second, then turns his back, looking at his choices.

I smirk and throw on the dress, everyone is looking at me.

I walk up to him and poke his side.

"I like the blue one." I whisper in his ear.

He glances down at it, not meeting my eyes.

But I can tell he is trying to ignore me.

I place my hands around his waist.

He leans into my touch.

"The blue one?" He finally whispers.

"Yes." I say again.

He takes my hands off his waist and takes off his shirt.

I sneak a peek, admiring his strong abs.

He notices me.

He slips on the blue shirt, turning towards me.

"very handsome." I purr.

He backs me up against the counter and kisses me.

I kiss him back, running my hands down his back.

He pulls back suddenly, and I stop the pout from showing on my face.

"Let's go rob a bank." He whispers in my ear, walking away from me.

"Let's go." I mumble to myself.

We get into his car and drive to the nearest bank.

He parks in the parking lot.

"Alright here's the plan, first, no killing anyone unless they get in our way."

"But it's so much fun." I whine.

"I know humans are pathetic but if we don't their less likely to alert the police."

"Second." He continues before I can get a word in.

"You are going to be the distraction." He pulls down my dress a little so my cleavage shows.

"And fix this." He fixes my hair.

"And do you have any lipstick?"

I pull out my red lipstick.

"And put that on and you'll be good."

I smirk and use the mirror to apply the lipstick, fixing my hair in the process.

When I'm done I glance his way.

"Perfect." He whispers, tracing a finger across my neck, below my collarbone.

"I could eat you right here."

I close my eyes and imagine what that would feel like.

"But I won't." He pulls back.

I roll my eyes.

"Ok, go in there and be the best damn distraction ever."

I obey and step out of the car in my stilettos.

He watches me from the rear view mirror.

I walk into the bank going to the counter.

"Hello, how may I help you today?"

I stare at the bank tellar.

"I'd like to open a checking account."

I try not to laugh about how ridiculous this is.

"Ok, checking or savings?"

Before I can get the word out, Stefan walks in with a gun.

"Alright, this is a stick up, you don't call the police, I won't shoot."

The bank teller is frantic as she opens the vault.

He walks by me and squeezes my ass a little.

I bit my lip.

"Thank you for your cooperation." He says, compelling the bank tellar to forget this ever happened.

I walk out with him as he laughs.

He puts his arm around me.

"So, did that get you a big rush?" I ask, looking at him.

He smirks. "You in that dress is doing a little bit more for me."

I kiss him with vampire speed on the car.

He groans and runs his hands down my body, grabbing my ass.

I lean on him so every inch of me is touching him.

He rubs my ass a little, feeling for my thong.

I let him pull it down.

I gasp as his fingers jam into me.

I lean my head against his shoulder allowing them to plunge in and out of me.

Once I reach my end I moan against his shoulder.

He smirks and opens the door to the car, slamming me into the back seat.

I wrap my legs around his waist, grinding on him.

He kisses my neck, going down to my cleavage.

He pulls the straps of my dress off, licking his way down my body.

I pull on his hair, as he makes his way down to my belly button.

He spreads my legs, settling his head in between them.

He bites my inner thigh with his vampire teeth.

I moan loud as he sucks my blood.

He pulls back, making sure the wound is closed.

I stare down at him, impatient.

He smiles lazily at me.

He takes off my heels, kissing my ankle up to my knee.

I tremble.

He presses a kiss where he just bit, slowly licking his way up from there.

When he gets to my core, I gasp loud.

He moves is tongue back and forth until I can't breathe.

"Stefaaaaaan." I yell, arching my back.

He doesn't stop until he knows I'll reach my orgasm.

He sucks on the part that I want most and I feel myself crumbling as he adds two fingers.

I lock my legs around his waist, never wanting him to stop.

He keeps licking until I release.

I'm trembling with my eyes closed as he unlocks my legs from his head.

"Told you I'd eat you." He whispers in my ear.

I sit up, searching for my dress.

He finds it on the floor, ripped.

"Sorry." He chuckles.

He pulls his shirt over his head and hands it to me.

I'm not complaining.

I pull it on, leaning my head against the head rest.

He watches me.

"Let's go hunt some people now, I'm hungry."

"Let's do it." he says. "but first you need another new dress."

I look down at what i'm wearing.

"I guess you're right."

He gets out of the car.

"Where are you going?"

He points to the clothing store.

"Oh."

He walks across the street shirtless and I want to tear out every girl's heart who is oogling at him.

**Sooooo yeah huge thanks to my baby who gave me all these ideas 33 review and rate and let me know what you wanna see next time?! Always a pleasure writing stelena like this! **


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9:

I look out the window to see Stefan approaching the car, he throws the dress in my direction, closing the door.

I roll my eyes and slip out of his shirt, instantly missing the warmth.

I throw on my thong, slipping on the dress.

He finally glances my way when I step out of the car.

My feet his the hot pavement, but I don't feel a thing.

"Ready to go?" He asks, a little too impatiently.

"Ready as I will ever be." is my snarky reply and he smiles at the offhand comment.

I start to walk with him, putting on my heels at the same time.

"Where are we going anyway?" I ask.

"We're gonna go on a hunt, deep in the woods."

"Sounds promising." I mumble.

"You know what we're hunting right?"

"pathetic humans."

"Good girl."

I shoot him a death glare and ignore him the whole way there, by the time we get there it's dark.

Images of a certain time flash in my mind.

"_If it was my choice I'd want to be with you forever."_

I shake my head at this distant memory and wait for Stefan's instructions.

"Get up in the tree."

Before I can question it, he grabs my waist, hoisting us up in the nearest tree.

I open my mouth to say something but he covers it with his hand.

"Shh, you'll ruin the suspense." He whispers, still covering my mouth.

I perk my ears up to hear two steady heartbeats.

I smirk forms on my lips.

Stefan removes his hand and pulls me close again.

"ok, here's the plan, I'll pretend like I'm hurt and I'll get them away from their cozy spot, second: you strike first, and feed and then I'll finish it off."

"Sounds like a plan." I say, jumping off the tree quietly, I hide in the nearest bush, my mouth watering for the sweet exlicer

Stefan walks to where they are, faking a limp. I see he has impaled himself with a stick.

Nice choice.

He grunts.

"Someone please help me I've been hurt." His voice is in pain.

The boy and a girl stand up immediately.

"Oh my god." The girl puts a hand over her mouth to see he's impaled himself.

"P.-please." Stefan grunts in mock pain.

The boy rushes up to him.

Big mistake I think and wait for the toture to begin.

After a few failed attempts to pull the stick out Stefan laughs.

"Wow can humans get anymore pathetic?"

I take that as my cue to step out of the brushes.

"I don't think so." I chime in, studying the girl.

She backs away from him.

"Yy-ou're not hurt?" Her squeaky voice asks Stefan.

"Of course not!." he exclaims, pulling the stick out with a grunt.

Her face is so white I begin to think she is going to faint.

"What are you?" The boy speaks up.

"Oh what a complex question, why don't I just show you?" Stefan answers.

I vamp speed up to the girl, my face changed.

She screams and tries to push me away.

I smirk, my vampire face still intact.

"Don't move." I compel her.

She stands still, even though she is shaking like a leaf.

I reach out and touch her neck.

I turn towards Stefan.

"Doesn't she have such a pretty neck?" I grin.

Stefan glances at me.

"Yeah." He answers, grabbing the boy, before he can run away.

Words of fear and impending death hang from the boys lips.

He pleads Stefan to spare his life.

"I'll do anything." Is the last sound before I hear a rip in the darkness.

I turn back to my girl, to see her face frozen in shock.

I shrug and move back her hair, biting into her jugular.

She doesn't move as I commanded.

I feel her heartbeat still over me and I know she is dead.

I look back at Stefan to see his face covered in blood.

I waltz up to him, giddy on whatever drugs the girl took.

He smirks, noticing my stance.

"Druggie?"

I nod, grinning.

"Lucky, my boy was useless." he sighs.

I touch my lips and spread the blood on Stefan's giving him a taste.

He growls low.

A warning.

I like it, I want to push him, for all the times he's pushed me.

"Taste more." I command him.

He pushes me against the tree.

Suddenly we hear a gasp in the distance.

"Their dead." I assure pulling him closer to me.

"What was that?" he asks, looking around.

I just want him to be focused on me.

"I don't k-."

Suddenly Stefan grabs his head, dropping to the ground.

"Stefan!" I yell, kneeling down and taking his head in my shaking hands.

"What's-."

A sharp pain shoots through my head, causing me to fall to the ground also.

I look up and see two figures approaching us.

My eyes barely make out one of them is Bonnie before everything goes black.

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	10. Chapter 10

Stefan

I wake up to see Elena across from me, her body flat on the ground and we're separated by bars. I wonder what happened because all I remember is getting a severe headache and falling to the ground.

"Elena?" I ask, reaching out to touch her, I growl in pain when I realize my hands are tied with vervain ropes.

She groans but doesn't wake up.

Vervain ropes? Nice.

"Elena." I say again, a bit louder.

She lifts her head up again.

"S-stefan?" She gasps, looking at me.

"Elena, where are we?"

"B-bonnie." She says again, I take in her form, pale, sweating, possibly hallucinating.

"What?"

"B-onnie." She says, again, shaking a little.

"Bonnie." I say out loud, growling.

That witch never knew how to keep out other people's business.

I stand up, as best as I can.

"BONNIE, I KNOW YOU'RE THERE. LET US GO." I yell, kicking the side of the wall with strength that's left of me.

Suddenly, the door opens.

"Stefan." Bonnie's voice comes out over an intercom.

"COME ON BONNIE, YOU CAN'T SAVE US, NO ONE CAN. YOU JUST RUINED ALL THE FUN." I yell, taunting her.

She wouldn't be able to bring my humanity back, I didn't care.

"Stefan."

I growl and hear the door open of my jail.

Damon is standing there, a worried expression on his face.

"Why hello, brother." I say, trying to tug lose at the vervain ropes.

"trying to bring me back?" I ask, glaring at him.

"Stefan, why were you with Elena?" He asks.

I roll my eyes.

"She came to me... " I smirk, when I see his hateful expression.

"Aw what's wrong big brother can't take that I've stolen your girl, again?"

He goes to hit me but then I see a hand appear on his shoulder.

Bonnie. I think.

"He's not worth it Damon." She says in a soft whisper.

Damon shrugs her hand off and crosses his arms.

"What were you doing with Elena?" He asks again.

"Oh you know she got bored of you and came to me, we had sex more then once actually, one time was with her humanity on, shocker right? It's like she always comes back to me. What did Katherine tell you again? Oh yeah, it was always Stefan?" I smile smugly at him.

Damon punches me in the face and I laugh, blood spills over my nose.

Bonnie gives him an aneurysm and he falls to the floor groaning.

"Damon, stop!" She says, looking at me, her expression clear: hate.

"Oh you hate me?" I ask, her rolling my eyes.

"I don't care." I finish.

"Let me and Elena out and I won't kill both of you."

Bonnie ignores me and goes over to Elena's cell, standing there.

I'm confused but then I realize what she is doing.

She starts enchanting words that I can only assume are bad.

Elena shrieks, covering her head with her hands

"Ahh, stop." She yells, I hear the evident pain in her voice.

"Hey!" I yell, standing up, Damon's still on the ground unconscious.

"Let her go!"I yell again, but Bonnie ignores me inflicting more pain.

Bonnie finally stops and Elena is in a ball crying.

I smirk. "You think tutoring her is going to make me feel anything. While you're wrong." I yell.

"We'll see about that." Bonnie says, going over to Damon

He wakes up groggy, I notice how she seems to take extra care in getting him up.

"Oh isn't that precious, Bonnie and Damon." I say.

"How long?" I ask.

They stare at me in confusion.

"How long have you been together?" I smirk, enjoying the obvious awkward silence.

"Goodnight Stefan." Bonnie says, inflicting my head full of pain.

Before I black out again I catch Damon's last words

"Do you think we'll ever be able to bring them back?"

Elena

I wake up, groggier then before.

I'm so angry I could kill everyone in the room.

I see Stefan, hunched over, still blacked out from Bonnie's magic attack.

I crawl closer to him, my vision blurry.

"Stefan." I whisper, reaching out to touch his hand.

He groans.

"Elena." He says, his head lifting up to catch my gaze.

"You're alright." He continues.

"Yeah, though it hurt like hell."

"Yeah." he says, quietly.

I squeeze his hand.

"Team Bamon has got us on lock down." He rolls his eyes.

"Bonnie and Damon?"

"Yeah."

Before I can say anything else, the door opens to my cell.

Stefan is being dragged out by Bonnie, leaving me with my worst nightmare.

Damon.

He glances my way, sitting on a chair.

I smirk up at him.

"Hello Damon." I say.

"Whatever Elena." he says , clearly not impressed by my behavior.

"Jealous?" I ask.

"Hardly." He answers, but I can tell his head is not in the right place.

"So, how'd you find us?" I'm curious to know.

"Daylight ring locator."

"Right."

"So you're never going to turn your humanity back on?"

"I haven't thought about it once, it's great not to feel and oh you don't have to try to bring me back with Matt. I don't care about him, I don't care about anyone anymore." I say, because it's the truth.

He swallows.

"Not even me?" He asks.

"Especially not you." I answer, my voice cold.

"Good to know." He states in a sarcastic voice.

"Hiding behind sarcasm? Nice." I say.

"Why did you sleep with Stefan?" He asks.

"Are you sure you want to know the answer to that question?"

He nods.

"Because I realized what we had was a lie. I was bored with you. I needed some passion, excitement, you know all those things you promised me? Well, I realized that you never gave them to me. So when Stefan turned off his humanity he brought back part of me that I didn't even know existed. Plus he is just fantastic in bed."

Damon growls, noticing my smirk.

"That's enough." Bonnie says, coming in the door behind him.

"So, are you two like a thing now?" I ask.

"No." They both say in unison.

I roll my eyes.

"Look, I don't want to be here and obviously you don't. So why don't you just let me and Stefan go and we'll be out of here."

" No can do, Gilbert." Damon says.

My face begins to change in anger.

"What makes you think I won't tear your throat out." I growl, growing more angry by the second.

"I know you won't because I know you're trigger."

"I told you Matt's not going to-

Before I can say anything, Stefan is thrown into my cell, a look of pure hatred in his eyes.

"Stefan?" I question.

I see his face begin to change.

"Elena..." he whispers, putting his head down in his hands.

No.

"Stefan is going to suffer if you don't turn your humanity back on, Elena." Bonnie says.

I growl and spring myself up, rushing to her, I was going to tear her witchy little head off.

"Anger.. that's an emotion." Damon says.

"I'm not angry." I lie to myself.

"You just took away all the fun." Stefan finishes.

"Exactly." I cross my arms.

Suddenly, Damon is behind Stefan, lifting him from the ground.

I glare at Damon daring him to try anything.

Damon snaps Stefan's neck, I watch his body fall to the ground with a thud.

"Tick tock Elena." I hear Damon say before everything goes black.

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	11. Chapter 11

_Stefan_

I wake up to see Elena looming over me like a ghost, her mouth in a firm line, her brown eyes dulled to annoyance. Her skin as pale as snow, she's probably hallucinating from the blood loss.

I wasn't far from her state if I was being honest.

"What?" I ask, trying to stand up.

She puts a finger to my lips and I stare at her.

"We're gonna get out of here." She promises, sitting down on the ground next to me.

"Their going to try to break us." I say, rolling my eyes.

"I don't think we're going anywhere, anytime soon." I add with an a annoyed face.

Suddenly the door opens and Elena and I both hiss at the contact of light.

Damon walks in, with vervain plants.

"Torture it back into us?" Elena scoffs.

"Not even close." Damon responds, moving closer to us.

I try to move but I'm instantly brought to my knees with an anyersum.

That witch bitch. I growl.

Suddenly my mouth is open and Damon shoves the vervain down my throat.

I yell loudly, feeling it burn my insides as it goes down, the pressure on my head increases and I see Elena look over at me, a look of worry and denial on her face.

"Turn it back on, Elena. I have no problem killing my brother, right here." Damon murmurs, as he shoves more of the liquified poison down my throat.

I cry out in pain, closing my eyes.

Suddenly I hear Elena crying out, but I can't open my eyes to see her.

She's laughing like a maniac and I'm worried the hallucinations have taken over her mind.

"You think that's going to break me?" She says in between laughs.

I scream louder as I feel my insides turning out.

"BONNIE!" I growl, holding my head with my hands, the blood rushes to my nose.

Elena is still laughing about God knows what.

Suddenly I hear her laughing begin to stop, it is slowly replaced with heart wrenching sobs.

I open my eyes slowly, a vision of white intervenes them, but as I blink, I see Elena on the ground, curled into a ball, sobbing.

I reach out to touch her, but I feel myself fading away to the black again. I barely make out her name when the world goes black.

Elena

How could you? I think, looking over at Stefan, I haven't stopped crying for the past hour. How could he make me turn my humanity off like that? Anger rushes through my veins. I feel the emotion start to settle in. I turn away from Stefan, hoping that he is dead. Memories flash through my mind of our escapade, I feel a new guilt come with each one, the bouncer, the poor bar tender, the people's heads I torn off, the couple in the forest, all dead because of me. It is my fault, I start to realize as the guilt sets in. I was the one who told Stefan to turn his humanity off. I professed my love for him, tried to get him back, failed, he made me shut it off, so he wouldn't have to feel all the terrible things he did.

"Rise and shine." Damon's voice interrupt my ever going sobbing.

"What do you want?" I bite back.

"Blood." He says, handing me a vial.

I reach out, but he stands next to me, handing it to me.

I drink from it hungrily, feeling my body being replenished at every last drop, suddenly I am choking, my vision goes blurry, I see Damon stand up.

"What did you do?" I yell.

"I spiked the blood I gave you today, with the cure." Damon says simply.

"Where did you find the cure?" I ask.

But before I can get the answer the room goes black before me.

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	12. Chapter 12

_**Stefan**_

I wake up to an intense pain through my head, it feels like it's on fire. Suddenly I hear a voice.

"Why did you do that?" I assumed it was Bonnie, I was amazed I could hear this well after, not drinking blood for 4 days.

Damon chuckles. "Because, she needed it."

I can hear the way Bonnie's heartbeat is going, I think she is nervous. I wonder why.

Who is this "she?" I wonder.

I look over and see I am alone in the cell.

Elena.

I start to get up but I'm sweating and in a lot of pain that I sink back down onto the dusty floor of the cell.

"Elena!" I yell, into the empty cell.

I hear no response.

Suddenly, I hear footsteps going into my cell.

I growl, ready to attack anyone who comes near me.

Damon enters, putting his hands up in mock surrender.

"Don't even think about it little bro." He sneers.

I smirk, looking up at him.

"How long are you going to keep me here? I don't want to be saved." I say, glaring at him.

He notes my expression. "I know, Stefan. I know you don't want to be saved but I don't care, I'm going to bring you back, and you can go back to hating yourself." He states.

I roll my eyes.

"Still mad about Elena?" I say, crossing my arms.

"Not even close." He says with a emotionless face.

"Where is she, anyway? Why did you separate us?" I ask.

"Oh, you'll find out really soon." is Damon's cryptic reply.

I stare at him, stonefaced.

"I don't care." I say.

"Oh, you will."

He tosses me a little vial of blood, and I grip it tight, nodding at him a thanks.

"There's more where that came from, little brother." He says, before he exits the door.

I look around confused but then shrug a little, opening the vial, the blood tastes so sweet going down my throat that I don't realize that I've crushed the vial. I hiss as the glass goes through my hand, but then it heals automatically. I want more blood. I need more blood.

_**Bonnie**_

Damon was insane if he thinks that it's going to work, we sit down in the sound proof room to talk about our plan.

"You know she's going to hate you." I say, watching his expression carefully.

"I know, but she'll get over it." Damon says, waving his hand in the air.

Although, this may be true, I'm not so sure.

"Alright.." I say, agreeing with him.

Ever since I had gotten back from the prison world he is the only one I wanted to have anything to do with.

I take in his sarcastic expression.

"Alright." He mocks me.

I squint my eyes at him.

"You're a genius if this plan actually works."

"What if he kills Elena?" I ask, watching a wave of sadness rush over him.

"He won't." He says, gruffly.

I sigh and stand up.

"Okay, let's do it."

We walk side by side to Elena's cell, as soon as we get there, we hear sobbing coming through the door.

"Elena." I say gently, knocking on the door.

"GO AWAY." She yells, kicking the door.

"Elena, please. We need you." I say, watching Damon.

"Need me for what?" She yells.

"You shoved the cure down my throat!"

"Actually Damon did." I say.

Damon glares at me and I give him a fake smile.

"Not helping Bon Bon." He says through gritted teeth and I start to laugh.

"Elena, please." Damon pleads.

I hear her sniffle through the door, her frail fingers trying to unlock it, probably not used to this human sensentation.

As soon as I get into the door I hug Elena.

She returns my hug, and I feel tears flowing down my shoulder but I let her cry.

"I'm human." She chokes out, looking at me, I see a small smile form on her face.

"I'm human." She repeats, louder.

"I know." I say, smiling along with her.

"I'm not a vampire anymore, I'm not- Bonnie, I'm not a vampire anymore."

I see her smile go to a frown in a matter of seconds.

"I'm so sorry this happened, Elena." I whisper.

"It's okay, I'm coming to terms with it." She says.

"Where did you even find the cure?" I look over at Damon, who is standing in the doorway, watching us.

"Damon led me to it, I went to the island we found Silas in and there it was, I know it's hard to comprehend, but I gave it to Damon and after a lot of thinking, I guess he wanted you to have it.. I don't agree with how he did it, Elena... but I know you never wanted this." I remind her.

"I know." She whispers, wiping her tears.

Damon steps into the room, where we are.

She looks up at him, tears brim her eyes again.

"I'm so sorry." She whispers, looking down.

She didn't even have to explain why. I knew. She was sorry for everything, the sire bond, the toxic relationship she was forced into at first, leaving Stefan behind, killing all those innocent people with and without her humanity, she was sorry for everything.

"It's okay." I see Damon whisper to her, taking her hand in his.

She looks up at him.

"Where's Stefan?" She asks, dropping his hand.

Damon looks at me, unsure what we should tell her.

"He's in the cell." He says.

"Can I see him?" She inquires, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Elena, he has his humanity off." Damon says, in disbelief.

"I don't care, I want to see him." She says in a determined voice.

"Okay, if that's what you want." He says after a moment.

And I'm surprised by his development.

But then I remember this was the plan all along, it a sick way we were leading Elena to her possible death, like a lamb to the slaughter.

I sigh a little, hoping she won't notice.

She stands up.

"Let's go." She says, leading the way.

Damon follows behind me.

_**Elena**_

"I'm human." I say, looking up at the ceiling.

I woke up, confused, at first, the dusty floor made me sneeze more then anything.

I looked down at my clothes, they were bloody.

Suddenly I remembered.

Damon shoved the cure down my throat.

Kinda like I did with Katherine.

How ironic.

I stand up, wobbly, I'm not used to my weak human legs.

My first thought is how the hell did this happen?

Relief washes over me in waves and I find myself crying.

And then another emotion washes over me, sadness.

I begin crying to everything I lost, when I was a vampire.

Half my friends, because I became codependent on Damon.

My brother, because I was never there for him anymore.

And last but not least, my undying love for Stefan.

I did so many wrong things when the sire bond happened that I cringe even thinking about it.

All the ways I hurt Stefan, how I chose Damon even after Stefan helped bring me back from the edge. I wasn't going to chose Damon this time, I never loved him. I realized this even with my humanity on. I made a promise to Stefan, I'd bring him back and that's exactly what I was going to do. So when Bonnie came into my room and started telling me about how bad Stefan was, I concluded for her that I don't care and I insist she take me there.

And here we are now, walking to the room that captures Stefan, the ripper.

I peer through the little window, watching him sit in on the cold hard ground, with his head in between his knees.

Memories wash over me in waves.

"I'm not scared of what you can do Stefan, I'm not." I smile small, reliving the night of the miss mystic falls pageant and the morning after.

Damon cracks open the door and I watch Stefan's head rise. He looks tired, exhausted, even. His pale white face sweating, his red eyes, how frail he looks.

He eyes follow me until I am standing right in front of him.

He starts laughing, and for a moment I am scared.

"My brother is so stupid." He says, slowly standing up.

I look at him, and cross my arms.

"And why's that?" I question.

His head snaps up and I know he knows that I am human.

"A frail heart beat." He mutters.

"Why's that?" I repeat, wanting him to answer the previous question.

"Because.. now nothing's gonna stop me from tearing your pretty little head off." I see his vampire smile in the dark.

"You won't." I say, keeping my ground.

"Let's see how wrong you are then." He starts to charge at me but is constricted by the ropes.

He groans in pain as they burn him.

I swallow, watching him.

"I want your blood." He states "And I will rip through this ropes to get it." He promises.

I shiver a little.

"Stefan, this isn't you!" I say, walking close to him again.

I stop until there's a safe distance between us.

"You don't need to do this." I continue.

"You need to turn it back on.. you have friends and family that love you." I say, in a certain tone.

He shrugs. "I have nothing to live for, I like myself like this, not caring, not getting hurt."

"Why?"

"Because, Elena..you left me." He says in a melancholy tone.

All the air I was holding in, comes out at once.

"Stefan." I say, moving closer to him, touching his clammy cheek.

He grabs my hand, smirking.

"Wow that actually worked, I knew it. Humans are controlled by their emotions."

I tried to tug my hand away, but he held tighter.

"Be still." He commands, his face changing to it's demon form.

"I just want a little taste."

My eyes are frighted as I look at his vampire smile.

I start to panic as he raises my wrist to his cold lips.

"You.. you said that one time you bit me, you never wanted to feel anything again!" I yell, reminding him of that night.

I begin to see his face change back to human, but then returns demonic, as if he's playing with his conscious, weighing his options, drain me or let me live.

"Stefan, please." I whisper, trying lamely to tug my hand away.

He ignores me, as his fangs bite deep into my wrist, sucking my blood.

I try to move away from him and yell for help, but he has me in a tight grip.

He's gonna kill me, I think, terrified.

I sink to the ground from the loss of blood. I feel his fangs ascend into my neck, I can't even scream anymore, but I know that I'm losing too much blood.

He growls and I watch the ceiling, fade in and out of my vision, until my vision becomes fuzzy.

I'm going to die, I think.

No more panic, no more causing Stefan pain.

I was finally going to be with my parents.

I should of died anyways, on that bridge, funny how I was dying now in my ex-lover's arms as he drained my blood from my body, I would no longer be a monster, things would be so much better.

I feel Stefan's fangs retract from my neck and I peer up into his angelic face one last time, I think I feel his fingers touching my cheek slowly, maybe he knows I am dead. I barely hear him whisper my name before everything goes black around me.


	13. Chapter 13

_**Finally got my inspiration to write this chapter for Steffy and I got to say it turned out rather wll, let me know what you think! &amp; don't worry bamon is coming! Review and rate and tell me if I should put more characters in this?thank you for the support!**_

"You don't want to do this... you once said that biting me was the worst thing you ever done."

Her voice rings clear in my ears as I sit by the fire, my head in my hands and tears stinging my eyes. 

I was human now. I had sucked the cure out of Elena and almost killed her but I was human. 

My emotions are on the on position and it hurts like hell. I see the flames from the fire decomposing the paper I had just thrown in there. That innocent piece of paper being burned to a crisp. Although, that innocent piece of paper represents Elena in my mind. Once I had turned my emotions off, needing a partner and crime and someone I knew who would stick by through everything. I almost sucked all the blood out of Elena, again, getting her to turn her's off. I had burned her beyond repair and honestly I didn't want her to forgive me. I didn't deserve it. I wipe the tears from my eyes, jumping in surprise when I feel a hand on my shoulder.

I forgot that I didn't have vampire senses anymore, I was insufficient to the supernatural world, now.  
"Please, just go away." I tell the hand, looking at the fire again, it starts to burn my eyes and I curse, rubbing them.  
"Not used to those human senses are you little brother?" He teases me, taking a seat on the bench. 

Great, now Damon was right next to me, probably going to rub it in that I was an asshole to Elena and I don't deserve her and I'd strike back he doesn't deserve her either. With all the stuff he put her through the last couple of years. Getting her to turn her humanity off, lying to her, killing people behind her back, forcing the cure down her throat. I could go on and that was all with his humanity on. I prepare my defense statement, staring into his blue eyes.  
"Look I know you think I'm here to gloat about how you messed up but... I won't. I know you're really hurt about what happened.. so, if you want to talk I'm here." He whispers, hand still on my shoulder.

I look up at see his blue eyes softened. I'm so caught of guard that I feel my throat tighten.  
I just nod my head, and turn away, not sure how to react to this support. Because let's face it ever since Elena, Damon hasn't been my brother in years.  
He gets up and leaves me to my thoughts, as tears run down my cheeks.  
I am a coward.  
Suddenly another voice stops me from my next thought, the voice makes my heart flutter and I'm so overwhelmed by that human feeling that I just stare into the fire again, not wanting to talk to her. Why didn't she just run? I grit my teeth together as her warm hand rests on my back, the touch sends a shudder down my spine. Usually, these things wouldn't affect me if I was a vampire but now that I am human it's weird feeling these things again, it's been 164 some odd years.  
"I know you think I hate you. Stefan, but I don't." She whispers in a small voice but I avoid her steady gaze on me, her hand still on my back.

I want to shake her hand off, tell her to leave me alone, but my mouth is dry and I bounce my knee out of nervousness.  
"I destroyed you, Elena. I made you turn your humanity off, the one thing that makes you who you are. I abused you when we were on our ripper binge, made you kill people, innocent people!" I exclaim, looking into then fire. "I drained you of your blood, not once but twice. I-I brought you to a club, I seduced you, almost took advantage of you..then we..." I can barely finish my last sentence, my throat tightening.  
"If I were you, I would hate me. I'm no better then Damon."

I finish, and I finally turn to look at her, knowing I will regret it but I do it anyways. I stare into her brown eyes, their dull, like someone sucked the life out of them. Her cheeks are flushed, like she's holding back a sob. Her eyes shining with tears, her lips quivering while she tries to keep it together for me. I turn away quickly, knowing her expression will haunt me in my dreams tonight.  
She retracts her hand from my back and instantly it feels cold in the room.

"Please don't brush it off, Elena. All those things... I don't deserve to be with you after what I've done. Just accept it, move on." I say, my heart breaking at each word, part of me wishing I could compel her, make her forgot even meeting me, things would be better this way.  
"Stefan.. don't." She says, I hear her voice breaking, my heart skips a beat, out of anxiety. I fold my hands between my thighs, to try to calm then, their shaking and I'm glad the fire barely lights the room because I don't want her to see what a mess I am.

She's quiet for a second, I can feel her eyes burning into my back, but I don't dare turn around. 

"If.. you want it like that." She finally whispers, starting to step away. I want nothing more to grab her wrist and turn her around, my heart aches as I watch her shadow on the wall drift away from the wall and my life. The fireplace was our spot, it's where I comforted her when she found out she was adopted, it was our first break up when Katherine actually drove us apart. It was where our hearts were crushed once again, when Markos put that spell on us, showing us our human future together, where we vowed we'd always love each other. And here we were again, broken hearts, walking away from each other once again.


	14. Chapter 14

_**This is longer because I love you, don't worry guys, Stelena is coming back! I personally like this chapter, and if you didn't no, no I don't ship romantic steroline I prefer their friendship and they should of stayed that way! Thank you for reading and reviewing, I promise happier times are coming and more Bamon! I love you guys.**_

I look down at the wooden floor, biting my lip, I needed to get out of here, a change of scenery, or something. 

I remove my numb body from the bench, running a hand through my messy hair. 

I get to my room, somehow, grabbing a bottle of Damon's best Bourbon he had so many that

I'm sure he wouldn't notice this one gone. 

I sit on my bed and raise the bottle to my lips, surprisingly it doesn't taste any different then it did from when I was a vampire. 

I drink it, looking at the ceiling, I'm almost surprised when I feel different, almost like cloud nine. I want to get past this feeling because I don't like it. I don't even like to be alone. I drink more, wiping the alcohol from my lips. I try to stand up, but fail as I stumble to the floor.  
I feel so down and I'm definitely drunk.

My mind floats back to Elena, her brown hair over he shoulders, laughing at me, the first day of school, gazing at each other, her lips quirked into a smile as I show off in front of the class.

Her sweet kisses, making me feel like I'm intoxicated on wine. Her gentle laugh, the way she crinkles her nose at things she doesn't like. Her arms wrapped around me, giving me invincible strength. I need to see her, tell her I can't do this without her. Tell her I love her, I never stopped. Before I know what I'm doing I'm out the door, drunk and stumbling down the street, to Bonnie's house where Elena is staying. I almost smile as I think about how I am finally coming home.

I barely make it there, my feet are blurry beneath me. I forgot how hard walking has become and the fact that I'm drunk doesn't make it any easier.

I grab some stones from Bonnie's driveway and throw them at the window hearing the sound of shattering glass.  
Oh shit. 

I wait until I see the porch light come on, Elena comes out dressed in her boy shorts and tank top, I scan my eyes down her body, wanting to pull her closer to me. I just want to lose myself in her sweet scent.  
She stares at me, furrowing her eyebrows, I notice she is holding a golf club, must be Bonnie's dad's.  
She set down the golf club, staring at me like I have grown two heads.  
"Stefan?" She asks, crossing her arms over her petite chest.  
I smile a little, nodding my head.  
"The one and only." I confirm, leaning against her door frame, trying to steady myself, but falling  
She catches my elbow and her warm hand feels pleasing against my cold skin. 

"Stefan.. what are you doing here?" She asks, still keeping her hand on my elbow  
"I had to see you." I confess, and she lets go of my elbow.  
"Are.. you drunk?" She asks, a judging tone to her voice.  
I lift up my hands in surrender.  
"Alright you caught me I raided the liquor cabinet at home. Don't tell Damon." I say and her mouth quirks up into a half smile. 

"Your secrets safe with me." She says, looking at me. Her brown eyes reflecting sadness.  
"Elena... I love you. And I've always loved you." I say, reaching out and touching her face, I feel her body tense up.  
"And.. you've always been on my side.. and I realized that I made a mistake.. we can move past this?" I question, and I see her amused smile drift into a sad smile.  
I gulp lightly, closing my eyes. I feel her hand on my wrist, gently pulling it away from her face.

"Stefan.. I love you, I do... but you're right we need.. time. Time to be with ourselves... I mean we just turned human.. I can't imagine how this is affecting you.." She says, breaking my heart all over again, the truth was I wasn't even thinking about that, so what? I was human. That meant nothing if Elena wasn't by my side.  
I feel tears well up in my eyes again, and this time she can see them, because she touches my face again. It reminds me of that night we broke up by the fireplace, both knowing it was over, neither wanting to accept it.  
I look down but she pulls my head up to meet her brown eyes, tears shining in them also. 

"This is hard... because I love you so much.. but.."  
I grasp her wrists in my hands, nodding my head in understanding. I had put her through too much, she needed time to process it.  
Hell, with the way I was going I think I needed time, too.  
"I just.. I want to live my life. I got a second chance, Stefan. You know how bad I wanted to be human.." She trails off and I nod again, quiet.  
"Please...just.. be happy." She whispers, leaning in closer to me.  
Her hands touching me is sending shivers down my spine.

I shake my head, tears flooding my cheeks.  
"I won't be happy without you." I say, my voice rising but she puts a finger to my lips.  
"You don't need me right now. Stefan, you need Damon. He's your brother.. you need him I know you won't admit it to yourself. With me gone it gives you a chance to rebuild the relationship.." She explains, but I shake my head again.  
"No, Elena. I can't do this." I whimper, watching the heavy tears fall from her brown eyes also.

"You can." She assures me, flicking some tears from my watery eyes.  
But all I feel is sick, like someone just ripped my stomach and all of it's contents out and stepped on them. I close my eyes again and feel the room start to spin.  
"Stefan, open your eyes." She says gently.  
I open my eyes and she looks into my green ones, I notice her eyes are red from crying.  
She leans in and brushes her lips against mine, I automatically pull her closer, desperate for her kisses even though this would be the last one.  
I kiss her back, snaking my arms around her waist, her tentivley wraps around my neck, although the kiss is short it's filled with passion, I close my eyes and feel tears drip down my eyes. She pulls back, pressing her nose lightly against mine and I stroke her hair lightly.  
I stare at her, her cheeks flushed, her lips trembling, her tears falling down her eyes.  
"See you soon?" I ask in a cracked voice, I don't even try to deny that I'm hurt anymore. She already knows, she always did."  
She nods with a small smile.  
"I'll see you, Stefan." 

For a second neither of us move but slowly I feel her grab my hand, her skin soft against my calloused hands.  
I close my eyes and feel her let go of my hand slowly, the door shuts with a thud and I stand at her porch for a second, hoping she will run back out to me and say it was all a mistake, we can fix this love.

I'm disappointed when I hear the front porch go off with a click. I stare at the wooden door and then feel tears well up into my eyes again.  
I grab the rocks from the window and stumble home, feeling the heartbreak set in again, my feet drag against the pavement, making me feel heavy. 

I don't know how but I make it home, I open the wooden door to the boarding house, walking inside. I jump when I see Damon in his favorite chair, flipping through his favorite book. When I'm in plain view, he stands up, taking in my appearance.  
"Where the hell have you been?" He asks, his voice rising. I can tell he's angry as he widens his blue eyes at me, his mouth in a straight line.

I roll my eyes at him. I didn't need him to watch over me like I was some weak defenseless human.  
"Damon, spare me the lecture." I wave my hand at him to tell him to go away. The room was spinning and I just wanted to lay down and cry.

I hear him sigh deep, finally I look over at him and he nods his head in an understanding why, his blue eyes showing worry though. I don't have the heart to tell him that Elena is leaving, and she wants nothing to do with us. Instead, I climb upstairs and lay face first down on my bed. What a night! I think, feeling the soft pillow against my face.

I hear him storm into my room.  
But I'm too tired to lift my head up and say anything. Couldn't he see my heart just got ripped out and crushed into a million pieces? 

"Go away." I mumble, rolling my eyes, I feel my body drifting away and Damon must have ran out of here because I hear a door slam shut, the pictures on my wall must have fallen off because I hear a loud crash.  
"Dick." I mumble, pulling the covers over me. The room is spinning and my stomach hurts but I manage to fall asleep.  
I don't have any dreams, if I did I don't recall them. My heavy eyelids open and I feel a tightness in my throat, it's not sadness though, it's something I haven't felt in a long time: sickness.  
I run out of my room as fast as I can, getting to the toilet bowl in the nick of time, I lean over it and hurl out the alcohol in my stomach, and then some.  
After I am done I wipe my trembling mouth with a shaky hand.

I stand up and flush the toilet, annoyed with this new affect from being human now. I couldn't keep my alcohol down.  
I splash some cold water on my face and sigh. 

I exit the bathroom, tired and just wanting to go back to my bed. But the smell of eggs that hits my nose make me change my mind, as my stomach rumbles. My feet trudge to the kitchen, there I see Bonnie sitting down shes dressed in overalls and a green plaid shirt, a pencil in her mouth, her eyebrows furrowed in concentration, looking at the newspaper, as I approach closer I see she is doing the morning crossword. 

"Hey?" I ask, looking at her.  
She peers up at smiles at me warmly.  
"Hey.." She says, her cheeks turning pink.  
I'm about to ask her what she's doing at our house but then I see Damon bounding down the steps, wearing jeans and a plaid shirt.  
I sit down at the table, watching him. 

"Good morning, brother." He greets me, punching Bonnie lightly on the shoulder, that must be their greeting in the morning. She rolls her eyes but smiles at him.  
She rolls her eyes but smiles at him.  
I glance over at the eggs and Damon must of read my mind because he grabs a white plate from the cupboard, scooping the eggs on it.  
He puts the plate down in front of me, sitting down. 

Bonnie returns to the crossword and Damon glances over her shoulder, his eyes trained to the piece of paper in front of her.  
"Damon, stop. That's creepy." She says, her voice annoyed.  
"Just seeing if I can help out. Bon-Bon." He says, reaching over her and handing me the salt.  
He always knew I loved salt on my eggs.  
I take the salt and put it on my eggs, I begin eating but all I can focus on his how Damon is way interested in this crossword puzzle.  
"Damon. Stop." Bonnie warns again, pushing the paper away from him.  
"Alright, fine." He says, turning away from her and to me.  
I fork the eggs into my mouth, extremely hungry. 

Bonnie's phone buzzes but she ignores it, filling in the crossword space.  
it buzzes again and she picks it up and then sighs.  
"Everything okay?" I ask, looking at her.  
Her mouth forms a straight line but she nods her head.  
"Yeah.. just figuring out this roommate situation." She says, looking at me, her expression softens.  
Elena... she must of told Bonnie.  
"Oh Elena is going back to whitmore?" I ask, faking a smile.  
I wasn't happy but I was happy for her.  
She nods, standing up abruptly, she glances between Damon and I.  
"I better get going then." She says, throwing her teddy bear backpack on her shoulder.  
Damon stands up along with her, running a hand through his hair.  
I notice this, it's usually something he did when he  
was nervous. 

"Yeah, I'll see you in a month?" He asks, smiling at her, but it's not a warm smile it seems like a very sad one.  
She nods her head and they go in for a quick hug, I smile lightly, watching as my brother's arm goes around her waist in a protective way. She smiles, hugging him for a moment longer.  
"Take care of yourself Bon." He says, smiling down at her.  
"You too Damon and remember what we talked about." She says, wagging her finger at her and then glancing at me.  
Bonnie and Damon and pillow talk? This was news to me. I guess with my humanity off I was close to figuring out just how together they were.  
He rolls his eyes and smiles, punching her shoulder again.  
She slugs him again and then turns to me, patting my shoulder. 

"Good to see you again." She says, smiling.  
I nod my head, raising my fist to her, she proudly bumps it and then walks out of the kitchen.  
I keep the little smirk on my face to myself, staring down at my eggs.

"Now we need to talk..." He explains, guiding me over to the bar stool again.  
I suppress a groan of annoyance, sitting down. I watch as Damon sits down next to me, he folds his hands in his lap. 

"I know you feel like you have no one now that you're human... and I know you think you can't talk to me, because history repeated itself and we let another girl drive a wedge between us. Stefan, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for forcing you to feed on blood, I'm sorry for killing Lexi, promising you an eternity of misery, I'm sorry for abandoning you when you were at your worst. I'm sorry for not searching for you when you drowned for 3 months in that safe, for not helping you with your ptsd, for putting Elena's needs before yours. Most importantly. I'm sorry for taking Elena away from you. I was so selfish and I know you'll probably never forgive me but.. yeah, Im sorry." He stares into my eyes, his blue eyes filled with such torment and guilt and pain that I have to turn away because it's hard to see him like this.

"I love you." He whispers, and he starts to get up, probably hurt over the fact that I can't even look at him.  
I turn towards him, looking into his blue eyes.  
"I love you." I nod, because it was the truth no matter how much Damon hurt me I would always love him. He's my brother.  
He smiles small, satisfied with this for now.  
But my heart swells in pain that he would think I could ever hate him.  
I run a hand through my hair and smile at him a little.  
"So, what's on the agenda today?" He asks, picking up the plate i just ate from and putting it in the dishwasher. 

I shrug my shoulders a little.  
"I honestly don't know. What can a human do in Mystic Falls?" I ask, and he taps on his chin.  
"Don't know but Blondie's been looking for you." He says, handing me the black phone.  
I resist the urge to roll my eyes but nod, taking it.  
"I mean you don't have to call her..." he trails off but I sigh, waving my hand in his face.  
"I'll do it." I say, grabbing the phone from the table.  
Caroline used to be my best friend but ever since I turned my humanity off and ran away with Elena. I realized that's all we could be, friends.  
I would never love anyone like Elena.

It's hurts to even think about Elena. I need a good distraction.  
I take the phone and dial the number, holding it up to my ear.  
"Hi, this is Caroline. You know what to do." Her voice sounds cheery and it almost makes me smile, thinking of the girl I used to call my best friend.  
"Hey.. it's Stefan. I'm wondering if you wanted to get together and talk about some things... so call me back."  
I say, and hang up the phone. 

I look down at the phone in my hands and run to hang it on the hook.  
Damon comes out of the bathroom and smirks at me.  
"Yeah, I did it." I say, walking upstairs to my room.  
Maybe Caroline knew where Elena was... they both went to whitmore.  
I pull out the flask I hid under my pillow and take a sip of whiskey, it burns down my throat but distracts me long enough to not think about Elena.  
I grab my journal from my bedside and lay on my stomach, opening it up.

Dear diary,  
I scrawl out, holding the page so it doesn't blow away with the wind, the sun shines through my open window, lighting the dark room up. 

It's day two being human and honestly I love it I can breathe again, when you're a vampire you never think about breathing, but now I can feel my heart beat out of my chest, I can count each breath.  
I also can eat again, I didn't realize how delicious food was until I ate some today.

The only thing I don't like is... I can't shut off my emotions or take them out on people anymore. I know it's not healthy but that's how I coped with a lot of things. It's weird writing my problems in here... venting.  
I fear if I don't I will fall apart...  
I stop writing when I hear a tap on my door, I look up curious.

"Knock, knock." Her high pitched voice says, coming in my room. Her face shows shame and awkwardness.  
Caroline.  
"Hey.." I say, standing from my bed but she makes no motion towards me.  
"I heard the news." She says, her eyes scanning my body.  
"Yeah.. um I'm human." I say, rubbing the back of my neck.  
"What?" Her face in shock, her blue eyes huge against her face.  
"No. I heard you and Elena broke up..." She adds, looking into my eyes and it's almost like she's a little puppy, begging me.  
I just stare at her, my breath hitches in my throat from the mention of her name.  
"Did she say anything about me?" I question, looking at her.  
She presses her pink lips together and shakes her head.  
"No she just told us."  
I assume she means Bonnie too, but why wouldn't she? Their her best friends.  
And why would she say anything about me? She hates me deep down.  
I nod, my expression cold.  
"Oh.." I trail off, sitting back on the bed with dissapointment

"But wow human?" She asks, looking at me.  
"Oh yeah.. it's a long story." I say, sighing and running my hands through my hair.  
"But you.. you got your humanity back." I say, looking at her. Her expression turns from a smile to a frown.  
"I did..." She nods, smiling a little bit.  
I raise an eyebrow at her smile and she blushes.  
"I went to New Orleans..." She explains.  
Klaus.  
"Well that's great, Care." I say, smiling a little.  
"Yeah.." She trails off sitting next to me.  
"How do you like being human?" She asks, looking at me.  
"It's okay.. it's new." I add, looking at her also.  
She smiles her toothy smile and nods.  
"I'm really glad you're back." I say sincerely and she nods.  
"Me too."  
"Care?" I ask, looking down.  
"Yeah, Stef?" She asks, looking at me.  
"You know it wouldn't of worked out with us anyways?" I ask, scared I have hurt her when the question comes out of my mouth.  
She laughs though, looking at me.  
"I know... you and Elena belong together." She nods, looking at me. Her blue eyes shining.

I'm taken back by this, but nod my head anyway.  
"I screwed up." I moan, burring my face in my hands.  
"You didn't." She assures me as she gently rubs my back.  
"She doesn't hate you.. she just.. needs space." She adds, and I look up at her to see her compassionate eyes.  
"Thank you." I mumble, not really convinced I didn't screw things up between Elena and I.  
"Whitmore is having a ball." She announces, standing up her face like it always did when she had an idea.  
"And?" I ask, looking at her but can't help but smile.  
"So... go with me. And we can pretend to be together but no kissing.." She crinkles her nose at the idea, but then laughs.  
I laugh too.  
"That would be like kissing my sister." I tease, punching her shoulder lightly.  
"Yeah, yeah." She rolls her eyes but laughs.  
"I'm pretty sure Klaus would kick your ass." She adds, and I smile nodding in agreement.  
"Anyways, it'll just prove she still loves you and think about all the crazy sex you'll have after." She winks at me and I laugh, feeling a blush on my cheeks.  
"Ew Care. I don't want you to think about that." I say, looking away, as I laugh.  
"Just saying." She puts her hands up in surrender.  
"The point is you'll see how much she loves you and how she needs to be with you." She smiles brightly at me.

"It's a deal." I say, sticking my hand up but she laughs in delight and wraps her arms around my neck.  
I hug her back, smiling.  
I really needed a hug and I really needed my best friend back.


	15. Chapter 15

**Review and rate?**

**Elena**

I slam my chemistry book shut, and sigh deeply, the professor exits the classroom, after dismissing class, and I'm left to my thoughts as I sit in my chair, biting my pen, I was screwed, at least, when I was a vampire, I could compel my way out of a test, or a good grade, now that I was human, I had to study just like everyone else. I sigh deep, and pick up the book, begging my legs to stand up.

That was the only downside of being human, actually trying, when I was with Damon, he always told me I could cheat, I'd never have to do anything like a human again, yet here I am, human, and failing chemistry. My mind drifts back to Stefan, and how he always helped me study, I feel a small smile on my face, as I take the pen out of my mouth, I miss him, I miss him so damn much, it hurts.

But, I had to let him go, figure out who I am, but truth is, I don't know who I am right now, I spent so long running from myself that I hardly know who I am today, I sigh deeply, not wanting to think these thoughts right now, I stand up and grab my book, holding it, as I walk out of the college classroom, in the hallway, I notice all the fliers up for the dance that is coming up, another stupid dance Caroline was advising, I sigh deep I didn't want to go, in fact all I wanted to do right now is curl up into a ball with cookie dough ice cream and watch netflix until I fell asleep, but Caroline- being a great friend will urge me out of my room and onto the dance floor where I can watch a million couples dance, and feel more depressed knowing that I won't have that ever again. I could, but like I thought previously, I can't be thinking and moping about Stefan when I chose to let him go, it's my own fault I feel this way, the truth is, I just think he needs his brother right now, and I hope they patched things up and were doing well.

I get to the dorm after walking by all the fliers for this dance, it was tomorrow night, and I still had to raid threw my closet and pick out a proper dress for it, a small smile forms on my face, as I think about when Stefan and I used to pick out our own dancing outfits for our high school dances, how he would twirl me on the dance floor, until I got dizzy, his body fitting into my perfectly, like a glove, as we swayed and held each other through the night, how I always begged him to teach me his dance moves, and he would always disagree, but I would keep prodding him to teach me until he'd give up and show me, I smile wider, and think about all those nights we spent after the dances in my kitchen, him preparing home cooked meals for me, while I watched from the couch, a glass of wine in my hand, as I watched him.

I don't realize a tear as escaped my eye until I feel it on my cheek, I quickly wipe it away. Now the memory remains but instead of happiness all I feel is a dull ache in my heart.

I grab my key and twist it in the lock, opening it, I'm not surprised when I find Caroline standing up, she's wearing a purple dress, and barefoot, as she stares down at her queen sized bed, all filled with different kind of dresses, frilly, long, short, jewled, every different color laid upon that bed.

I glance up at her, and see her smiling at me, her blonde hair down her back in waves, and her blue eyes sparkling.

"So, I was thinking that we change the theme from 20's to masqurade!" She squeals, happily, and I watch as my bubbly best friend, picks up a dress.

"Since I knew you wouldn't be able to chose a dress, I went and picked up some for you." She says, as she throws it at me, and I catch it, looking at her, and the dress, sits in my hand, I look it over it's not too bad, a long red dress with lace at the end, the fabric feels soft against my hand, and I smile softly, not amazed that she chose this one for me, Caroline knows I had short dresses.

"Thanks, Care." I say, sincerely,with a warm smile, but she waves me off like it was her job to do this for me.

"Try it on." She urges me, and I sigh deeply, nodding, as I take the red dress into the bathroom, I shut the door, and strip off my clothes, I put on the red dress and zip it up on the side, it fits me perfectly and I smile in the mirror, letting my long brown hair down from the pony tail it was on, it doesn't look too bad, pretty soon, Caroline yells at me to come out, and I do.

Her eyes go wide at the sight of me, and she smiles like she's the best stylist in the world.

"Wow, Elena, you look breath taking." She says, with a small gasp, and I smile, blushing lightly, thank you, I say with a nod, and she smiles.

"We're going to look so hot, here's your mask." She says, and she hands me a black mask with lace on the eyes, I study it, and suddenly, I feel excitement rush through my bones, I was actually excited to attend this dance, now.

"Alright. I'm excited." I admit softly, and Caroline smiles at me.

This is the first time I felt excited in months, and it was all thanks to Caroline, I hug her, and she hugs me back, patting my back, as I let go, she still smiles at me.

I knew I only needed Caroline to make my life a little better.

Night time rolls around and I strip out of the dress, hanging it up, every time I look at it, I smile a little, feeling a the same rush of excitement rush through me, maybe I just needed to go to this dance and let go, dance with someone new, and not think of.. him.

The pain was too much right now..

The next day goes by in a flash and I find myself back in the dorm, looking into the mirror, as I straighten my long brown hair, with a flat iron, I sigh deep, and apply the touches onto my makeup, I chose a winged eyeliner, and red lips, making me look very neutral under my mask, I finish with my hair, which I tie up into a sophistcated updo, and take little pieces, to frame my face, I grab the mask from the door and put it on, tying the black silky ribbon in the back, I look into the mirror, and shiver lightly, I looked like Katherine, that night she impersonated me in the masquerade dance, the same night I broke up with Stefan again, not wanting to put my family in danger, well, now I had no family left, my brother was gone, my parents dead, my aunt dead, my dad dead, all I really had was.. Stefan, in those times, his warm arms protecting me, shielding me from danger, his selflessness, his honor, the way he would always protect me no matter what, even if he got hurt in the process. And now he was gone, too.

I sigh through my nose, and shake these thoughts through my head, I didn't need them on the dance floor, for once, I was just going to let go and dance my heart out tonight.

I grab my purse, and hear the music down the hall, as I walk, I was ready, ready to do this. It had been too long since I enjoyed myself.

I walk into the building and see all the couples dancing, their bodies gyrating to the beat, and it almost reminds me of when Stefan and I had our humanity off, and we tore through the whole club, bestowing our repressed anger on innocent people, I shiver lightly, and walk to the bar, ordering a drink, they card me, which I'm not surprised as I show them the I.D, I couldn't compel drinks anymore, so I go away from the bar, drink less, as I walk out on the dance floor, so many people, moving around, and I just watch them, having the time of their lives, possibly in love, and it hurts, hurts to know that I'm so alone and broken, this young. I look around and don't see Caroline anywhere usually she was always in the middle of the dance floor, I search around the room for a familiar face, maybe someone who is in my class, but I find no one, why would they want to talk to you? You're so quiet and lame, Elena. I sigh deep, as my eyes drift over faces, suddenly, my breath hitches in my throat, as I see a tall figure in the distance, he's wearing a black suit, and it looks good on him, brings out his toned shoulders, his brown hair slicked back, a white bow tie on his collar. I can't see his face because there's a red mask covering it.

Stefan? I wonder quietly, as I stand there with my mouth open, I move closer, but not close enough for him to see me, and I see he's laughing with some blonde, she looks beautiful in her yellow long gown, her hair also done in a up do. They look like their having a good time, but I can't help but feels jealousy ache in my bones as I watch them.

"_All along it was a fever a hot headed believer, I threw my hands in the air said, show me something. He said if you dare come a little closer." _

I watch as the couples separate in small groups, wrapping their arms around the partners so lovingly, and it makes me sick, I recognize this song, it's the song Stefan and I danced to that night, with my humanity off, at senior prom. The way he begged me to come back, pain in his voice as he tried to remind me of the things we once had, I didn't believe him, nor did I even look at him, trying to fight the flowing emotions in my head, scared that if I broke, I'd look weak in front of him, and I didn't want his comfort at that time, I just wanted to feel numb to all of it. But, When he dipped me slowly, and looked into my brown eyes, his green eyes soft as he held me there, I felt a little spark in my heart, and I was scared, scared to turn it back on, so I faked it, told him I didn't have a heart, and I watched as he pulled back, pain in his eyes, poor him, still loving me at my worst, still believing I was in there, somehow. And I was, he was the one that helped me turn my humanity back on, after I almost killed Matt, and I couldn't thank him enough for that. The way he brought me back from that downward spiral.

"_round and round and around we go, tell me now, tell me now you know.. not really sure how to feel about it, something in the way you move, makes me feel like I can't live without you.. yeah, it takes me all the way, I want you to stay.." _

Suddenly, I'm about to turn around, as I feel my face collide with warm chest, I grunt, as I look up to see a white mask, I rub my cheek lightly, about to apologize to this stranger I just bumped into, his white shirt wrinkled now from my cheek, over his handsome black tux. But, he smiles at me lightly, and holds out his hand, his eyebrows raised.

I gulp lightly, and start to turn away, but his green eyes are so soft through his mask, that I almost feel like I have to dance with him, not for wrinkling his tailored suit, but there's a connection, the way he's staring at me, I feel a light spark in my heart, as I touch his hand with my own, my heart racing against my dress as he pulls me out to the dance floor.

"_it's not much of a life you're living, it's not just something you take is given.. round and around and round and around we go, now tell me now tell me now you know.. not really sure how to feel about it, something in the way you move, makes me feel like I can't live without you, yeah, it takes me all the way, I want you to stay.." _

He pulls me out onto the dance floor, his warm hand finding my waist, as he takes my other hand with his, holding tightly, I wrap touch his shoulder, looking into his green eyes, as he sways with me, his fingers lightly brushing my fingers, and I feel an electric shock jolt through me.

He looks into my eyes while we dance, and I feel his heartbeat against mine, as I touch his shoulder, he pulls me in closer, swaying with me to the melody, I smile lightly, and feel a blush on my cheeks, as he gently takes my hand, again, spinning me around, I laugh lightly, holding onto his shoulder again.

"_Oh, the reason, I hold on. Funny, you're the broken one, but I'm the only one who needed saving.."_

I stare into his green eyes again, feeling like an idiot as I realize that this must be Stefan, I'm dancing with, the way his hand is touching my waist, his fingers clasped to mine, making me feel warm inside, for the first time in months, I stare up into his mask, his green eyes filled with love, and a light smile on his face, he twirls me again, and I feel in love, as I come back to him, his back to me, he twirls me again, and grabs my waist, his warm hands making me feel dizzy and giddy as he suddenly dips me low, staring into my brown eyes, and I feel the grin on my face, fade, as I think about all the times he dipped me like this, the rush of emotions it gives me, as he stares at me so intently, like he is right now, studying every emotion on my face, his green eyes gazing towards mine, sending shivers down my spine.

"_Cause when you never see the light, it's hard to know which one of us is caving.. not really sure, how to feel about it, something in the way you move, makes me feel like I can't live without you, yeah it takes me all the way, I want you to stay.."_

He lifts me up from the dip, and I stare at him wide eyed, he stares at me, also, fear crosses into his eyes, as he waits for my reaction, I gulp lightly, as the song ends, and we just stare at each other, neither knowing what to say.

He's the first to pull away, but I grab his arm, and he looks down at me, hope in his eyes, as he watches me, my hand touches his warm shoulder as I try to form the words in my head, why are you here? What is going on? .. but I can't think, and his hands feels so right in mine, right now, so I think of the one thing I can do, what I wanted to do ever since we walked away from that fireplace, that one night, the night he ended it, ashamed, and how he came to my house drunk, taking it all back, telling me how much he needed me, and how I let him walk away, not today, I realize I can't fix the things in the past, but I need to make it right now.

I lean in, and kiss him gently on the mouth, I feel him tense up at this, probably not used to, I pull away, biting my lip, not sure how he feels about it, and I feel stupid, as I turn away, but I feel a rush of joy pass through me, as I feel his warm hands on my cheeks, pulling me towards him, I feel his hot breath on my face, as he pulls me closer, gently, his green eyes staring into mine, as he tilts my head up, his lips pressing down on mine, sending shivers all over my body, from my heels to my head, as he pulls me closer, I kiss him back, and the kiss is so gentle and soft, that I feel my head spin, as he pulls back, it was like we never even kissed, and all I can think is how I need more, how much I missed him, so, I melt into his arms again, and kiss him, kiss the guy who broke my heart too many times, the guy who re started my heart twice as many times, the guy who saved me countless of times, the one that vowed to love me forever, my one true love, Stefan Salvatore.


End file.
